Okay, I spoke too soon.

This flare-up really sucks. It got 100% worse today. My feet are so grotesquely swollen that I had to wear flip-flops to work, and everyone who happened to glance at my feet was all like, "Oh, my God. What happened to your feet?" My hands are so swollen that I had to soap up my rings to get them off, and it still wasn't easy, but I was afraid if I didn't get them off I'd end up in the ER having them cut off of my fingers after they started cutting off my circulation.

Walking is so excruciatingly painful that I am lurching around like one of those horror movie zombies. My hands hurt so much that every time I have to touch anything, it causes pain. I can barely turn a doorknob or a faucet.

And pretty much every single joint in my body has decided to join the party: ankles, knees, hips, hands, feet, elbows, wrists, back, neck, and yes, shoulders now, too. I mean, absolutely everything hurts. Even typing is starting to hurt, although it's still manageable, obviously (though I'm having to backspace an awful lot to fix typos).

I am hoping that this is maybe just a reaction to stress about starting a new job tomorrow. I don't feel stressed, but maybe I am subconsciously anxious and my body is reacting. I know stress can trigger an RA flare-up. What really sucks, though, is that I have to walk into my new job like this tomorrow if I don't improve overnight. How embarrassing.

"Hi, I'm here for my first day at work. Try not to look at my freakishly swollen feet or hands, or the way I'm lurching around like a drunken zombie and wincing in pain every time I have to move. I feel fine, really."

Ugh.

This is not good.

I have to say I am becoming alarmed at how bad my RA has gotten over the past year or so. These bad flare-ups (I'm in the middle of yet another one) have become increasingly severe and more frequent.

The current flare-up seems concentrated in my feet, knees, hips, and hands. For the past week or so, I have had tremendous pain and difficulty when standing up after being seated for any length of time and when walking. My feet are very swollen and I'm having difficulty wearing shoes. My fingers are all swollen and I can no longer straighten the middle finger on my right hand. It is in a permanently bowed position, and I suspect I'll need to see my hand surgeon to have it fixed. Of course, with the new job starting this week, I can't be making any doctor's appointments or scheduling any surgeries for awhile. I don't want to start asking for time off right after starting a new job.

At least this time my shoulders aren't involved. That's always the worst because the simple, ordinary daily activities like taking a shower and getting dressed in the morning and driving to work become so unbelievably painful and difficult when my shoulders are flared up. And at least, even with my hands all flared-up and swollen, I'm not having much difficulty typing. I guess I should count my blessings.

Baby Zach

Now for some sad news: We learned last Friday that Baby Zach has autism. He is two years old now and has not yet spoken a word. He had been exhibiting some of the telltale signs of autism, so his parents have had him evaluated by various experts over the past few months and the diagnosis has been confirmed.

Zach is "globally developmentally delayed," meaning he is behind in every area of his development. There is an autism spectrum with a range of severity, and what you want to hear are the words "highly functioning." Unfortunately, Zach does not fall into that category. Apparently, three is a critical age, so he has a year to make some progress. However, if he does not start to catch up by the time he turns three, it is likely he will also be diagnosed with mental retardation (which is more common in autistic children than in the general population). It is also likely that he will need to live in a group home as an adult.

This is just heartbreaking for his parents and for the entire family. Please keep Zach and his parents in your thoughts and/or prayers.

New phone. I has it.

My soon-to-be new job apparently comes with a strict no-personal-email-or-internet-use-from-company-computers policy. This is not because they don't want people checking personal email or web surfing on company time, but rather because they are scared to death of computer viruses. The firm is basically paperless. No paper client files are kept -- they are scanned and saved onto the server and then shredded. And, due to the nature of the business, the client files contain all sorts of confidential personal and financial information about the clients. So, I can kind of understand the fear of viruses and trojans and such, although I think they take it to the extreme -- the owner of the firm told me he recently fired an attorney merely for checking his personal email from his office computer. Yikes!

Anyhoo, I didn't want to be without access to my personal email during the day, so I went out and got me one of the sweet new Samsung/Sprint Instinct phones. It is really, really cool. Sadly, the web browsing feature leaves a lot to be desired, so I'm also going to get me one of these. Then I'll be set to do a little web browsing at least on my lunch break. I'm such a geek.

Seriously, though, I can't stop playing with my new phone. I can watch t.v. on it. I can browse the web, albeit in a slow and clumsy fashion. I can read and send email. I can take photos and video. I can watch youtube videos. I can check the weather and even look at the radar. I can play games. I can listen to music. It has a calculator and a calendar. It has GPS navigation. It has a voice command feature. I can tell it, for example, "Find Nordstrom," and it will show me where the nearest Nordstrom is, or I can say, "Call Mom" and it will dial my mom's number. I'm sure it does lots of other stuff, too, that I haven't yet discovered. Also, the battery lasts forever and it came with two batteries and a charger so that I always have a fully-charged spare on hand. Basically, it rocks.

New job. I has it.

(That was lolcat-speak, for the uninitiated. Warning: This site -- and its companion loldog site -- will take up a lot of your time if you love animals.)

Anyhoo, yes, I have a new job. I got the offer today after completing the last part of a long and arduous hiring process, which included a phone interview, multiple tests (including an IQ test), a long written interview, reference checks, multiple in-person interviews, reading a book about living trusts, and drafting some sample documents for a fictitious client. Whew!

Fortunately, I apparently aced all of that and they made me a very enthusiastic offer. I will give my notice at my current job tomorrow and start the new one on July 1st.

I'm very excited to be getting back into my favorite area of law (estate planning) and back in a small firm. Of course, there is the usual trepidation when changing jobs -- hoping it's the right move and all of that -- but I have a pretty good feeling about it and am looking forward to it! It certainly can't make me any more miserable than I am at my current job, and I suspect I will really enjoy it.

Blogging slump

Yeah, it's been awhile. I've been lazy, and there also hasn't been much going on in my life that was worth writing about. I've been recovering from my foot surgery (almost back to normal now) and working my way back into my regular exercise routine. As of this evening, I am back to my usual distance and resistance level on the stationary bike, so I am very happy.

I've also been looking for a new job a little bit more aggressively than I had been. I'm still being picky about which postings I will apply for, because I don't want to go from one bad job to another, but when I see something that looks promising, I'll send a resume and cover letter right away. I had an interview a few weeks ago with a small firm, but didn't get the job. It would have been a very significant pay cut, so I wasn't too terribly disappointed when I didn't get it. Apparently it had come down to me and one other applicant, and she had a slight edge over me due to some very specific experience she had that I didn't (doing Medicaid recovery for the state). Oh well.

I have an interview this Thursday with another small firm, and it sounds promising -- and also would not entail a huge pay cut -- so I am keeping my fingers crossed.